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Do you exercise regularly? Good. Just as we work on our physique and appearance in order to feel great in our own body, we also need to work on our mind to feel good mentally. This is all the more important, especially when we are surrounded by situations that cause us anxiety or stress.
Do you happen to come home from work, have your head full of worries and not be able to just “turn off”? Or do you watch the news in the evening and feel anxious about what is happening around you? You are certainly not alone. The good news is that there are many ways you can help to free yourself from these negative feelings. In today’s article, we’ll introduce some tips for maintaining positive mindset. We will also explain how to work with your mind to better manage all everyday situations.
Why is it important to maintain a positive mindset?
Mindset has a big impact on virtually every area of your life. It largely depends on how you perceive things around you and how you react to them. Try to find out in your memory what has recently bothered or upset you, or otherwise damaged your mood. For example, just how you reacted to a certain stimulus distinguishes you from people who “set” their mind in a positive way.
I missed a bus in the morning. What do I do?
- Negative mindset: Well, another day like this! I am already behind, my work will pile up due to my late arrival and because of that I won’t even have time for lunch. Then I come home in the evening, eat everything I find in the fridge, and get even fatter, all because of the bus.
- Positive mindset: Never mind, I planned to go for a walk today anyway, so I can do that straight away. Calmly, I will think about what I will be working on throughout the day, I will sort out my thoughts, I will come to work with a clear head and my day will be as productive as possible.
Which group do you want to belong to – among the people who let every little thing ruin their day, or among those who can find something good in everything? I assume that the second one sounds better. The negative thoughts that we carry in our head affect not only our mood, but also our stress levels or anxiety. Short term, these conditions can increase our performance, for example, before an important presentation, they can help us to concentrate, and in addition, awaken the body to achieve its maximum potential. However, the problem arises when stress or anxiety becomes your long-term wingman. The development of phobias, anxiety disorders, aggression, depression, eating disorders, sexual dysfunction or an increased risk of suicide is nothing unusual. [2]
At the beginning, developing a positive mindset can seem like a superhuman task. However, the opposite is true. There are many simple practices that you can gradually apply in your life to increase the quality of your everyday life.
How to maintain a positive mindset?
Positive thinking is not just about being happier and showing a positive attitude towards events and situations. But it also doesn’t mean that you have to become a hippie looking for rainbows and unicorns. Simply put, this is a philosophy of life that can help you create real values in life in the long run and build skills that will make your everyday life more enjoyable. [1]
In connection with positive thinking, positive emotions play an important role in our lives, as they have an effect on our future actions and performance. For example, a positive emotion in the form of “joy” that appears in your life (it can be caused by many situations) evokes the joy from other things and the desire to engage in other activities. In reality, this means that a person who begins to feel joy may have a greater desire to create, sport, push their boundaries and so on. By embarking on other activities out of joy, those other activities can again evoke joy, thus creating a certain cycle of positive emotions. [2]
“Positive thinking is a mental and emotional attitude that focuses on the bright side of life and expects positive results.” – Remez Sasson [3]
6 tools for maintaining positive thinking
Let’s start with a couple of techniques that can help you to actively develop positive thinking. [4] [5]
1. Stay optimistic. Try to get into new things, take risks and assume that everything will turn out well. Do not accept the possibility that your efforts will not pay off, and at the same time do not allow yourself to be drawn into a pessimistic view of the world and the constant thinking about negative events.
2. Accept the reality. Accept that things don’t always turn out the way you want them to. If this situation occurs, take it as a done deal. Don’t get bogged down in negative thoughts about a situation you can’t affect. It should definitely not discourage you from trying new things again.
3. Be resilient. Even negative things happen for a reason. They teach us to cope with failure, disappointment, and they also lead us to learn from bad things, bounce back, and live on. After all, even small children learn by mistakes. So many times they had to fail and fall to the ground before they learned to walk.
4. Be grateful. Actively appreciate all the good things that happen to you in life. Are you failing at work? Be grateful that you are healthy and have a roof over your head. Do you have problems in your personal life? Be grateful that you have a free afternoon, and you can work out or read a book. Even in the worst life situation, there is always something you can be grateful for.
5. Practice mindfulness. This technique consists in learning to live and perceive the present moment. Thanks to this, you can better appreciate the everyday joys that you may perceive as something common, and also better work with your thoughts or feelings.
6. Maintain integrity. Be just, fair and honest, and on the contrary, avoid lying and cheating. If you purposefully harm, you cannot expect them to treat you differently. Your behaviour will return to you like a boomerang, both good and bad.
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How to get “positivity” into everyday life?
Now, when we are familiar with the techniques that lead to a positive mind, you also need to identify simple activities that you can do every day to become a positive-minded person over time. What can you do about it?
1. Make your every morning enjoyable
Think about what can make your day more pleasant in the morning and also what can make you upset. Are you following news that evokes negative feelings in you? Don’t do it. Instead, play your favourite music with your morning coffee or enjoy the silence that will calm you down before a hectic day.
Smile and tell yourself that today will be successful and productive. If it’s nice outside, open the window and let the sunshine in. You can also make yourself your favourite breakfast. There’s no way that oats with peanut butter or delicious pancakes won’t make your day just a little bit better.
2. Take negative events as an opportunity
Did you say to yourself in the morning that this day would be worth it, but you are not doing well? Even such a situation can occur, and it is necessary to be able to respond to it. There is no reason to put yourself down. If something goes wrong, stop, recap what happened and what the consequences are. After this step, a situation arises where it is necessary to get the most out of an unpleasant event.
- Did your favourite coffee mug break? Take this as an opportunity to buy a new one that will be even better. And as a bonus, get a package of freshly roasted coffee with it.
- Did your partner break up with you? Finally, you have time to devote yourself fully to hobbies that you have neglected so far due to activities you used to do together.
- Did you break your leg and can’t play sports? You have the opportunity to develop other skills. Improve your foreign languages, sign up for an online course or finally read the book you have been putting off for several months.
Every situation brings new things and possibilities to your life. However, you can also make the most of the negative ones. All you have to do is change your approach and start looking at them as an opportunity. We can consciously choose whether to accept the situation as bad or try to find something good in it. And if you can’t think of any positives in the newly developed situation, try to consult it with your loved ones.
3. Treat others the way you want them to treat you
Have you ever heard this theorem before? There will probably be something to it. If someone smiles at you, what do you do? You probably return the smile. And it works the same way in a negative context. When you treat someone badly, you can’t expect them to behave differently.
So, do what you want from others. Treat them politely, with respect, give compliments, help others, wish them success, support them, share joy with them, and you will see that such behaviour will return back to you.
4. Do not cling to material things
Try to be less materialistic. Deliberately search your memory and recall the period three years ago. You probably won’t remember the time you bought new pants or a t-shirt. But I’m sure you’ll remember a place you’ve visited, an event you’ve attended, or a strong moment you’ve had with a loved one.
Therefore, try to live for experiences and build strong relationships with people who are important to you. As a result, this will make you a much more positive-minded person than a material thing that you would buy and not even remember in a few years.
5. Praise yourself even for a minor progress
You take for granted praising others, but hand on heart, do you know how praise yourself? When was the last time you said to yourself that you did something well, that you were really good? You don’t have to praise yourself only for big things. Start with the little ones.
- Are you saving for a holiday? Praise yourself for the first 10 dollars that you put away for it.
- Do you go to the gym? Praise yourself for your new personal record.
- Are you a runner? Praise yourself for not giving up when it started raining.
- Do you want to read more? Praise yourself for the first page you finish.
Well-aimed self-praise is the next step in making you a positive, confident person who knows their qualities and can appreciate them. If you value yourself for what you can do, you are more likely to be valued by those around you for the same skills.
6. Don’t complain about things you cannot change
How many times have you complained that it was too cold, too hot or raining outside? And what about the consistently increasing prices? There are things you can’t change, and there’s no point in complaining about them, spoiling your mood with them, and then passing on your negativity to others. Accept it as a fact and try to find something positive about it.
If, on the other hand, you know that you can influence the situation, don’t complain and do your best to change something. [8]
- Did your brand-new phone stop working? Stop complaining and take it back to the shop.
- Are you not happy about the current political situation? Go vote or get personally involved within your neighbourhood.
There’s no point in plain complaining. If you know you can at least partially contribute to change, go ahead and do your best. This is also the way to be satisfied with your own actions, which will help you to maintain a positive mindset.
7. Enjoy little things
We live in a time of prosperity, when many things become a matter of course for us. Yet, there are millions of people in the world who have nothing to eat, where to live, and even no access to drinking water. Take notice of these “matters of course” and enjoy them.
- Instead of being in a bad mood because it’s Monday again, and you will spend the rest of the week in front of the computer, working on some Excel sheets, be happy that you even have a computer and can work.
- Be happy about that favourite snack waiting for you in the cupboard.
- Enjoy getting wrapped up in your clean sheets when you go to sleep.
Focus on what you have in life and enjoy it. It is not a matter of course and you having what you have now is definitely not set in stone.
If you want to master this skill even more, you can write down things you are joyful about and grateful for in your diary. Then when you’re at your worst, just flip through the pages to realize how great things you have in life.
8. Don’t be influenced by the negativity of others
Do you have someone around you who never smiles, constantly complains, points out the shortcomings of others and sees only the bad side of everything? Think about whether such people bring something into your life, and if not, do not seek their company. If you value your time, there is no point in wasting it with people whose presence drags you down or otherwise negatively affects you.
9. Meditate
There are many ways to meditate. Several types of meditation are out there, each with its own meaning. If you are unfamiliar with these methods, you can start with mindfulness, for example, a technique that will teach you to be aware of the present moment.
How to practise mindfulness?
- Start by finding a position (sitting, lying down) in which you will feel comfortable and relaxed.
- Focus only on your breath, try not to think about anything else.
- If you can’t focus on your breath, try counting the seconds of inhaling and exhaling, this should distract you enough from other thoughts.
- When the mind does start to wonder off to other thoughts, try to push them into the background and return to the breath.
When you master this technique, you will learn to work with your mind and you will better manage all the obstacles of everyday life.
10. Learn to talk to yourself
Having a head full of thoughts is not unusual, but the important thing is what the character of these thoughts is.
- Do you blame yourself for your mishaps?
- Do you compose catastrophic scenarios of situations that await you?
- Do you constantly replay the negative situations that have happened to you in your life?
Change your view of the situation and learn to talk to yourself matter-of-factly. Instead of blaming yourself for something that did not work out, be proud of yourself for trying to do that thing at all. Instead of feeling bad about gaining weight, praise yourself for having more strength to use to achieve your dream figure. Try to talk to yourself as a friend. You probably wouldn’t tell a friend that she is useless and won’t achieve her goals, would you?
11. Find time for activities you enjoy
What would you do if you had no responsibilities? Would it be drawing, singing, reading, playing sports or watching TV? Make a list of activities that bring you joy. And even if you feel that your diary is absolutely full, find at least one moment in each and every day to do something you like. Avoid thoughts like “if I find some time, I’ll watch TV” or “if possible, I’ll read for a while in the evening”.
If you know how to be organized in work matters, learn to reserve space for activities that you enjoy as well. There is no shame in having a 30-minute break in your diary to lie on the couch, play video games or a short workout. If you do something you enjoy every day, you will be generally happier and quite possibly more efficient at work.
12. Don’t be afraid to ask for professional help
There may be times in life when even the best instructions on how to get rid of anxiety and negative thoughts don’t help. If you are at that point, it is definitely appropriate to get help from a professional. They will certainly help you solve your issues more efficiently and quickly than wannabe experts on internet forums. You better stay as far away from those as possible.
What to remember?
Managing the pitfalls of everyday life can sometimes be a difficult chore. However, with a positive mindset, solving problems can be much easier, and you may find that certain problems only exist in your head. The sooner you master the basic tools of positive thinking and apply them in small steps to your everyday life, the sooner you will see an improvement in the quality of your life in all aspects.
And what about you – are you drowning in negative thoughts, or are you able to get rid of them quickly through positive thinking? Tell us about your techniques that keep you in a good mood in the comments below.
[1] How Positive Thinking Builds Your Skills, Boosts Your Health, and Improves Your Work – https://jamesclear.com/positive-thinking
[2] Barbara L. Fredrickson – The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions – https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1693418/pdf/15347528.pdf
[3] Dr. Geetika Patnaik – Positive Psychology for Improving Mental Health & Well-Being – https://books.google.cz/books?id=XLEcEAAAQBAJ&dq=%E2%80%9CPositive+thinking+is+a+mental+and+emotional+attitude+that+focuses+on+the+bright+side+of+life+and+expects+positive+results.%E2%80%9D&hl=cs&source=gbs_navlinks_s
[4] Dr. Ahmed Sayeed – Sky is Yours ISBN 9789389774054
[5] Courtney E. Ackerman, MA – What is Positive Mindset: 89 Ways to Achieve a Positive Mental Attitude – https://positivepsychology.com/positive-mindset/
[6] Paul Broomhead a kol. – The Effects of a Positive Mindset Trigger Word Pre-Performance Routine on the Expressive Performance of Junior High Age Singers – https://doi.org/10.1177/0022429411435363
[7] Sheldon Hanton a kol. – Self-confidence and anxiety interpretation: A qualitative investigation – https://doi.org/10.1016/S1469-0292(03)00040-2
[8] Kowalski, R. M. – Complaints and complaining: Functions, antecedents, and consequences. – https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.119.2.179